October 28, 2010

Day 247-Toast to the End of the Tunnel

Happy, happy, happy hour! And I'm in desperate need of one this week.This is a friendly mixer, nonetheless, which means come one, come all for $4 drafts-and bring your cute friend ;)

I'll be scoping out the scene per my usual OTMITM norm, but I'm also conducting market research on the NYC dating scene. Because no matter what these singles tell ya, there's only one reason for a mixer, in my opinion. So how is Half Pint on a Thursday night in the Village? I'm set to find out...

"So, WHAT'S your status, your HONEST reason for being here tonight and what are you planning to be for Halloween?"

Girl 1-Single; To get out of the house and mingle with friends; Waldo

Girl 2-Single; Meet more firiends and see what guys will be like-cute or old? Costume tbd.

Girl 3-Single; Meet boys, totally. German beer maiden.

Girl 4-Married; To party and meet a cool married girl. Lumberjack.

Girl 5-Single. Connect w/ friends in alumnae group. Doesn't know costume yet.

Now the guys...all of which worked in finance, go figure.

Guy 1-married; free drinks, but then they weren't free...Waldo

Guy2-single; to meet nice girls and an excuse to leave work early; Frank Sinatra

Guy3-married; to get out; Edward dildo-hands

Guy4-married to a dog (I told them I was writing first responses!); 1-excuse to go out 2-an opportunity to have a new experience 3-interested in creating a new peer group; 80's rock star

Guy5-single; looking for female friends/to meet a nice girl; someone who has been dead for a long time (ok...)

Guy 7-in a relationship; being a wingman; geek, not a nerd

Finished up with Guy 7 and for the upteenth time, I explained the blog. Unlike, his easygoing counterparts, Guy 7 basically said, "I think that's selfish and immature." EXCUSE ME?!?!? LET ME BETTER EXPLAIN MYSELF....

Yes, I know....but I had my heart broken by someone who was those things.

"But all guys aren't like that."

Yes, I know...but this isn't about other guys. it's about me.

"You just need to be confident and move on."

Yes, I know...that's the point. I'm working on that.

And on it dissolved into a cloudy haze of Bud Light-fueled comments which received a bunch of fiery retorts. Now, this was a guy who had four years on me and a girlfriend, just to clarify. Not someone who was hitting on me or being flirty. He was deadly serious. And in a strange, weird way, he helped. It was my first ANTI-OTMITM encounter, and while I listened to his complaints I held strong. Once I was able to hold off my friends from launching their own counterattacks, I was able to have a frank conversation with the guy.

Along the way, I was enlightened (according to him) on the importance of a girl wanting her guy (sexually) and the importance of a guy making himself desirable-and I was always told it was the other way around?!?!? Not to mention, couples should have the same social routine-homebody and 4am party animals do not a marriage make. And even better, he had previously dated his current girlfriend seven years prior only to dump her when she didn't like him watching Family Guy. With a little wisdom of another long-term relationship in between, they had re-connected based on the fact that he's over the stupid stuff that kept them apart before. He grew up and discovered that some things were more important--being able to enjoy a person when you're in the same room for 12 hours a day, the fact that they will be a good parent, commitment.

I was just polling people on a whim--and because it's a funny conversation starter--but all in all, it led me to meet someone who saw the light at the end of the tunnel, at least farther than I could see. Cheers indeed!

I'm Off the Market & In the Moment!

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